Appraisal @ 51

First, I would like to thank His Excellency, the President, for declaring March 31^st a public holiday in the Republic of Kenya in honour of my birthday. I pleaded with the state not to make a big deal out of it, but they insisted that I had to be recognized as a great Kenyan who had made a significant impact. Hehehe.

My dreams are valid, folks. One day, I will address the nation, so wacha I practice for now. The first birthday of my 5^th decade coincided with the Muslim Eid celebration, so Gava declared it a public holiday. It was a good coincidence because it was a polite, easy, and slow Monday to reflect and celebrate quietly. I started by fixing my car, then house shopping with my baby shark, followed by a few other random activities. A pal of mine commented that it’s such a dad way of spending a birthday. I suppose simplicity gets attractive as we age, eh?

How time flies. I remember my 50^th bash like it was last month, and here we are a whole year later. Time indeed does wait for no one, and the prayer remains for Sir God to help us make our days count and not just count our days. A pal asked me on Monday how 51 feels. I responded that it’s much more hopeful than 41. My early 40s were torturous internally, but looking back, it was a requirement for graduation into a meaningful life. During that period, I questioned my existence and carried a dark weight on my soul that was desperately seeking an outlet. It felt like eternal damnation.

Now, at 51, as I look back at the past year, I see that it has been delightful and lighter on the heart and soul. The big and meaningfully busy life is unfolding. I feel like I’m celebrating a first anniversary with an older and hopefully wiser Lucas. One who has come of age to finally be presented to the world and add immense value. The last year feels like I have searched less and been searched for more. I have replaced some private battles with new ones, like the fight for my health. I’ve been in good shape over the years thanks to some exercise, but good genes mostly, so I have my family tree to thank for that.

But there comes a time when autopilot will need some human intervention. My gym journey has been flat, like eating fresh nutritious food but bila salt or spices. I’m told I will get to like it. It’s funny that the first gym session after my birthday was slightly enjoyable. This gym story began after I was informed by the doctor that running, hiking, and golf are good but consume the little muscles I have. That I will need to strength train. My bubble was burst when I was told that lifting the long lenses on my photo safaris in the wild doesn’t count for strength training. Only the gym will do that. Thankfully, I have a wonderful trainer, so that helps.

Folks, if you are in those dark, confusing seasons of life, please do not give up and break glass. Your life may smell of smoke, but it’s not on fire yet. It’s the resetting going on internally that’s hot and smokey with poor visibility ahead. You’re in transition and best not to harakisha (hurry) or short-circuit it. The temptation to do that is high, but if we do, then we mess up a beautiful transition that was ushering in probably the best season of our life. A season of joy, impact, and balance. Halftime is often messy but life-changing for the better if we let the process take its course.

After exiting my 40s and now one year into my 50s, I feel I can look back from an elevated position and see the zigzag journey I’ve been through. Reminds me of scaling the Baranco wall on Mt. Kilimanjaro back in 2022. We would be sweating buckets, and our feet felt like they had been strapped with lead. Then, the zigzag walk to reduce the effect of the steep ascent felt like we were going around in circles. We kept going, now that we had brought ourselves to this big mountain. But regret was screaming in us. We paused at the top of that wall and looked back. I couldn’t believe that we had scaled it. We were also rewarded with a view that should be paid for. Well, I guess we paid the price Hehe.

That’s how the other side of transition looks like. I recall, at the beginning of this year, resolving that I would leave a lot of room for detours. Again, age does help us realise we are not in control of much. Already one happened in February when a photo I had entered into a national photo contest became runners up. What a pleasant detour. Folks keep putting your talents out there. You never know where they will take you.

My coaching has also grown the most over the past year. Again, it’s like I was in the oven before that and now fully baked for my clients to enjoy tasty coaching sprinked with age and some wisdom, hehe. I’m grateful that I went through the furnace. More so that I didn’t quit and return to my previous life. I dread to imagine what kind of guy I would be like. I appreciate all who have walked with me and promise to continue serving the nation, so help me God.

That’s how you end your address to the nation ama haha. Hang in there, folks. Do not give up through your transitions. The best awaits you, hapo mbele. Trust me.