Uncertainty Is The Only Certainty.

Show me your friends and I will tell you who you are. That’s a quote I’m sure many of us heard as we grew up. My parents did the best they could to keep me away from bad company when I was young. As I grew older all they could do was discourage me from friends who were negative influences. I was kichwa ngumu like any teenager and campus boy.

As I look back I wonder how I missed the path of self-destruction. I feel lucky sometimes to be where I am in life compared to some of my high school and campus classmates. I’ve met a few who I longed to be cloned into back in the day because they were A students yet I was terribly average.  I blame our 8-4-4 system of education for the view that taught us success in life was only measured through academics. I can now confirm that being an A student in class doesn’t guarantee you will get an A in life. I consider myself a B+ at least in life which is a marked Improvement from the C student that I was hehe.

In addition to God’s grace and my parents’ prayers, I agree with Daskal that to succeed in life despite the stage we are in, it is key to surround ourselves with the right kind of people. I’m glad life separated me from bad company as I grew up. I think the good Lord just moves on some of our behalves because we lack the wisdom or the will to make the call and abandon relations that are detrimental to our wellbeing.

Currently in my forties I feel more self-aware and confident to decide which friendships to pursue and which ones to drop. One of my biggest rewards of halftime have been the many new friendships I have made which feel like destiny friendships. These are people who have come into my life to help me fulfil my purpose. Many of them speak into the future that I seek and act as small torches (like the toy plastic ones we get at our local Chinese restaurant here in lavi when we buy their flie (fried) rice) to mulika the path ahead. They do this through conversations we have when a light bulb comes on and confirms a move I was contemplating. I love those coincidences. I call them God accidents.

Daskal says we are only as good as the people we surround ourselves with, so let’s be brave and let go of those who weigh us down and stick with the ones who reflect who we want to be and how we want to feel. I have chosen in this season to seek out the right people in the hope that it will increase my chances to do the right things. It’s not always easy to walk away from relations that no longer serve your calling especially when some have lasted many years. But we have to find a way somehow. Maybe start by lefting a WhatsApp group that is of no value to you now and gain courage as you go along to clean house.

Uncertainty is the only certainty.  I feel like this point has been repeated many times but using different words. Maybe it’s because embracing the unknown is key to a successful halftime transition. Not knowing becomes the new normal. Vagueness has been my staple diet the last five years and now it is slowly beginning to taste like it has some aromat in it. It’s not too bad. I recently read in a book that if you want God to do something huge in your life then you have to give up control. That’s much easier said than done. Most of my prayers between 2014 and 2018 were of salvation from my wilderness and uncertainty. I would pray without ceasing for God to answer my prayers. Now I realize why He lengad my many requests. I’d make petitions and soon after rush to manufacture the answer to the prayer. It was like I had this intense tummy ache and needed a whole box of Eno antacids for instant relief.

Folks the grim reality is that change in our lives takes more time than we would like. Especially when its change that’s leading us to our destiny. That change is confusing, unclear and extremely uncomfortable, at least for majority of us. I believe that’s the reason many people get to the end of their lives not having lived but just survived. It takes huge guts to face and engage with uncertainty and wade through it until you come through on the other side which is certainty. I’m now slowly seeing that this labor is not in vain. I’ve come to realize unknowingly that the process is training ground for handling that great future better. Daskal emphasizes that, “It’s how we embrace uncertainty in our lives that leads to great transformation of our souls.”

It’s never too late to start your journey to a life of significance folks. Thank you for indulging me on this four-part series. I look forward to more huko mbele.