Ability – Average.

I had a visa interview this week on Tuesday. I am planning to visit Her Royal Majesty, The Queen of England. She invited me after reading my blog a couple of times. I hope I have successfully fooled someone here. After all April Fool’s Day was juzi tu. Applying for a visa is one of those processes where one has to look for all the papers that describe your existence. Birth and marriage certificates for you and your dependants, bank statements, title deeds, evidence that you don’t live on a tree and so on. Soon we may be required to give a pint of blood, our shoe size and the toothpaste brand we use at home.

I reached for a suitcase my Dad bought me after high school where I keep all our important documents.  Back in the day I used to look for opportunities to show it off to my pals because you opened and closed it using a secret three digit combination on both ends. How cool was that in 1992? The only thing missing then was the gun and stash of well-arranged bank notes inside. V.O.K (Voice of Kenya) also had movies back in the day. I believed only President Moi’s finance minister and I had a suitcase like this in the whole republic. I even considered hiring mine out to the then minister to carry his budget for the country on budget reading day. The hustle has been there all along as you can see. My dreams are valid folks. Hehe…

As I went through my few important documents, I came across my form four school leaving certificate from the Duke of York, (which in locally means, Lenana School). This school even had a golf course and I hear rabbles (form one students) were the caddies sometimes. Clearly golf was meant to be part of my life. God accidents I tell you.

For some reason this paper caught my attention. The first item to be filled out on the head teacher’s report on the pupil was ability. It read ABILITY: AVERAGE. I got stuck there. There were other parameters like initiative and leadership that were more positive, but my focus was on my ability. At the bottom, my headmaster Mr Maneno (a.k.a check man) had signed and stamped the certificate. I noticed I had also signed (by writing my name), accepting this report.

That has bothered me kidogo this week. The authority in my life (through this report) declared me average. As I look back 25 years ago, I can’t help but question if this report has influenced how I have responded to life subconsciously. I remember how I admired my classmates who always topped the class and how I wished I’d be cloned to be them (not just like them). I went through a huge part of my schooling very self-unaware. In fact, for a long time even after campus I was blind to the success others saw in me especially in business.

Now you can see I’m opening up my skeleton closet.  Oh how I love the fourth floor. No shame in who you are and the popularity contest ended kitambo. I thank God this 8-4-4 system is being flushed down the drain. It has its positives and supporters I’m sure but I am glad we are doing away with it. Now that I’m a parent to three great Kenyans, I’d be doing serious damage to my kids’ self-perception if I summed up their life as average purely from a grade. Well I did get a C+ that earned me the seventh and last intake into campo. I think someone dropped out then I got called to fill their space. Kweli Mungu yuko.

Folks, don’t get me wrong. I’m glad how my life has turned out, at least most of it. Last year I met one of the former classmates I wanted to be cloned into when in Changez (Lenana). He was an A student. Even how he ate and made his bed was A like. These are those guys after KCSE results are out the university sends you fare to report to campus. He stopped me in town and it took a moment to recognise him. He didn’t look very impressive for what I thought he’d turn out to be in life. He told me he was an insurance sales agent and is paid on commission. I thought he’d be more like the MD of the company by now. He tried to sell me a cover so as to meet his targets. After we parted ways I wondered what happened to the A student I knew.  Had life after school given him a C and termed him as average?

I’m not as successful as I’d have wanted to be at 40, but I thank God for not answering some of the prayers I made while growing up. Folks, let us be careful how we judge our kids and people we meet. But above that, let us be careful not to judge ourselves as average because I personally believe no one was created average. We are each an A student of life when we find our calling and occupy the space that life gives us. Our actions may be average sometimes due to self-defeating beliefs or hang-ups that we carry, but our existence is meant to be far from average.

I may have signed that certificate 25 years ago out of ignorance. I have short-changed myself sometimes based on that belief, but it’s now my turn on the dance floor. Folks it’s not only your turn to be on the dance floor. It’s your turn to be near the DJ and give him your playlist for you to dance to.  My intention today is simply to nudge us to refuse the negative reports we may have signed while self-unaware or accepted from others. Let’s be all we can be, especially now at 40 where we are learning that the best version of yourself is you.