How Much Is Enough ?

Folks, what do you call a struggle with chums that is mostly in your mind but manifests a lot in your speech? I call it money trauma. When your long money tension resides in your mind for a long time, it distorts your thinking and interaction with money. Scarcity mentality becomes your default thinking and even when you make money, you quickly normalize the blessing, trivialise your earnings and default back to hakuna pesa. It’s not a nice place to be hence the trauma.

Many folks suffer from money trauma and Covid made it worse. That characterized most of my 40s and it’s a dome I’ve had with Sir God for a long time. Every time I was about to make a major transition He dried up my financial tap. I’m still not sure why he would do that without consulting me but clearly, I had no choice in the matter. He knows me better than I know Lucas so ni sawa tu. I’d have said, Mungu anakuona (God is seeing you) but he’s the Mungu so I surrendered. Sometimes our biggest source of comfort and security needs to be taken away for some deep internal rewiring to be done. Otherwise, we would short-circuit down the road and mess up big time.

When I turned 50 I declared that this would be the decade to maximise my gift for impact and income. I chose to graduate myself from the school of hard knocks (my midlife transition). I’ve been knocked quite a bit through my 40s but I now begin to sense that I’ve been a construction site internally for most of the past decade. I’m looking forward to reaping the reward of long character development in this new decade.

I picked a book on the Psychology of money by Morgan Housel in an attempt to detox my mind and replace it with a better money mindset. Most things we do are created twice. First in the mind then in reality. I am determined not to be the biggest obstacle to achieving my mission on earth. I liked the simple analysis Morgan gives when he says, “The trick when dealing with failure (which is what I felt at halftime) is arranging your financial life in a way that a bad investment here and a missed financial goal there won’t wipe you out so you can keep playing until the odds fall in your favour”. Just keep playing the money game and make sure to remain in the game as that’s the lifeline.

Maybe that’s how our folks who earned a few thousand shillings monthly combined, bought land, built homes and put us through school. It didn’t make financial sense how one could stretch a coin that much. When I asked my folks how they did it even they couldn’t give a clear answer. So, wherever you are with whatever you have stay in the game. Don’t quit and soon the odds will swing in your favour. That’s the outlook I choose to cultivate going forward.

Morgan also says that people who have control over their time tend to be happier in life. That’s what I want to spend my money on going forward, buying my time. And to do that He mentions 3 things to remember. First, the hardest financial skill is getting the goalpost to stop moving. I am guilty of that. I’ve often suffered buyer’s remorse when I replace a car or clothing. Initially, I’m convinced that it’s best to upgrade then soon after I regret it and even miss my old ride or clothes. I admire my doctor who still drives his 40-year-old Volvo that he came back to Kenya with after his studies in the UK. Now I’m even envious of his classic car. Akii I need help hehe. Maybe my next appointment with him should be on how to cement my goalpost to be still for the next 40 years. A prescription on that would help hehe.

Secondly, social comparison is the problem here according to Morgan. There will always be someone doing worse than you and another doing better than you. That’s where normalizing our blessings becomes our downfall. We minimise what we have and magnify what others have and the gap seems much bigger than it is in reality. And the rat race intensifies to fill it. Morgan cautions us that the ceiling of social comparison is so high that virtually no one can hit it. It’s a battle that can never be won and the only way to win it is not to start fighting it. So, in addition to stopping the goalpost from moving, try not to start the social comparison fight because you are bound to lose.

The third thing to remember according to Morgan is that there are many things never worth risking no matter the potential gain. Success and greed are mostly blind. They distort our sight and all we can see is how much more we can acquire irrespective of the cost. We ruin our reputation, health and key relations in pursuit of more and we only realise we have thrown away the baby with the bath water when it is already too late. It’s important to draw the line and know when and where to stop. A good indicator is when you know that any further move down this road will cost you what is valuable and important like friendship, freedom, family, health, reputation and happiness. If we can seek to grow and progress with these non-negotiables in sight then we will succeed with enough.

The Halftime program has dedicated a whole session to this topic of how much is enough. That’s because we cannot live significantly when we are struggling to meet our needs on the one hand or when we have ruined our reputation with questionable deals on the other. We ask participants to draw a picture of how their life would look like if they were clear about how much is enough. Feel free to do that folks. What are some benefits of having a clear answer to that question? What do you need to get to agreement with your family on How much is enough? Mine is up in that picture. I want to use my gift to help many people and travel the world doing it as I photograph nature. I’m also targeting to earn enough passive income to give my baby sharks a decent education and buy time to spend in my favourite small-town coaching folks online. And lastly, make work optional for mummy shark.

So, folks How much is enough? Draw me a picture… hehe

PS: Next week I’ll be in a jungle somewhere without bundles for Wi-Fi hehe. I promise to make it up the following week. See you in August good people.