Not In Charge.

I have been busy this week preparing for the Magical Kenya Open, which is now in the home stretch. By the way, when do we qualify for the home stretch? Is it two weeks away, one week, or one month away? I used that terminology because it sounded right. The heat is turning up, and so is my anxiety. But following last week’s story, I’m trying to learn to let go, be present, and trust the process—whatever that means hehe.

One way of doing that is learning random things along the way. Last Sunday, I spent the afternoon at Karen Country Club watching as the team offloaded a 40-foot container from a truck and placed it under power lines. It took quite some expertise for the driver, operating the long hydraulic arm, to pick up the container using a chain, direct it while suspended mid-air, and gently place it on the ground under the power lines. I’m not sure why I’m sharing this, but it was quite fascinating. Now I’m a bit knowledgeable about how shipping containers are offloaded. I can contribute kidogo should such a conversation arise.

Did you know that if the container is too heavy and the crane starts to lift it, the container’s weight could break the truck’s chassis in two, like breaking a wooden stick over your knee? Now you know hehe. The process took forever because we had to offload our branding merchandise and steel signage at Muthaiga Golf Club, where the containers were being picked from.; load the container onto the truck, then put all the materials we removed back. And repeat the same process when delivering it to Karen.

Such random observations are helping me avoid overthinking this new role. I hid at home to do some work during the week, away from all the public service heavy lifting. You have to find a balance between working for others and meeting your own personal obligations. While at home, I picked up a book from our home library: The Rules of Life by Richard Templar. I randomly landed on Rule 54: ‘You are not in charge.’

Templar tells us that no matter how hard we try, we are not—and will never be—in charge. We may try to control things and determine outcomes, but life is just not like that. That reminds me of a chat I was having with a high school pal. We talked about our old classmates: how some are doing well, others not so well, and others are no longer with us. What determines success in this life? We pondered. Some bright students with even brighter futures haven’t done too well. Others whose futures looked bleak due to their academic and other struggles are now thriving in life. Life sometimes feels like a game of pata potea.

Do you ever feel as though someone or something is directing the agenda of your life, despite your best efforts to script the outcome? I often feel that. Perhaps that’s why I concluded that my life is a series of ‘God accidents’ (God-incidences). Templar’s rule tells us that stuff happens—good stuff and bad stuff. The journey will sometimes be scary, sometimes fun, and sometimes boring. We have to experience both the good and the bad. Or, as we say in golf, you get lucky breaks from bad shots and bad breaks from good shots. That’s just how life is.

If we were to control outcomes to only what favours us, then life would be quite predictable and boring. We would stagnate and lack challenge and motivation. When life is predictable, it loses colour; it becomes black and white, or even just grey. That’s not how I would like my existence to be. Colour is brought by surprises, some good and some not so good. We take it in stride, give it our best shot, and leave the outcome to Sir God. I’m choosing to adopt that mantra in this season. It’s giving me peace.

I’ll balance this position with a caveat that Templar explains well. We may not be running the show, but that does not discharge us from all responsibility. We still have obligations and need to be respectful of the world we live in and those we share it with. We just need to accept that we don’t have overall responsibility for the whole show and everything in it.

Folks, our lives are like movies, and we should watch them accordingly. Cheer at the exciting bits, cry at the sad bits, and hide during the scary moments. If only we could fast-forward the scary bits, like we do at home, hehe. Nevertheless, life doesn’t have a fast-forward button, so we have to endure those trying moments and hopefully, emerge better.

Templar goes on to say that we are neither the director nor the projectionist. We are not even the usher who shows people where to sit. We are the audience, so let’s enjoy the show. Once we accept that we are not in charge, we can let go, folks. Let’s try it this year.